Friday, November 22, 2013

Let's Chat... to Reiki or not to Reiki???

 So Let's chat.
Did you know I once had a student for Reiki that
was not going to take the class
that her heart yearned for because her
employer didn't believe in it?
 I also have had multiple students bow out of classes
due to lack of partner and family 
belief and participation.
I have even had students that left their partner for
being closed minded about Reiki once a class was taken.
 Take a look at these photos.
That's my fiance!!
This was a moment that made me love her oodles,
do you want to know why?
She was doing her own brand of Qi Gong.
Not because she is trained, not because she is interested in it
(although she may be)
but because she has a pretty awesome sense of humor.
You see I don't require my partner to believe in
the things that I believe in.
My practice, belief, or dedication to anything is my business
it's not hers.
Love is patient and love is kind.
Love does not give ultimatums and fight over space.
Love is simply love,
IF 
you find yourself requiring your partner to like what you like, 
to do things your way,
to understand what you find important,
to think like you,
to act like you,
oooooops you need to clone yourself.
Who wants to be with someone that has all the same interests?
Who wants to be with a robot?
Who wants to live that kind of boring,
hum drum,
dull existence?
 If Reiki gets it up for you, take the class.
If your partner forbids it... darlings that isn't about Reiki that is about your
relationship.
If your partner does not understand what Reiki is,
why you are so into it,
or why on Earth you would waste your time...
smile sweetly and say gosh I just love it when you support my interests.
And at some point simply ask them if they would like to know more.
Sometimes people poke fun at things they do not
understand and are too embarrassed to ask about.
 Sadly some people still believe that asking questions means the same thing as being
dumb or stupid.  People do have Egos, good, bad, or indifferent
you will most likely meet the ego in the people that you feel
judge you.
You can take the bait and let your baggage talk to their baggage or
you can take the higher road and support yourself
by only talking to people that support your decisions in the beginning.
Remember you didn't choose your partner through the eyes of Reiki 
if you had, they would be with you on the Reiki train.
Requiring your partner to get on a new train that 
you want to ride is not only selfish,
it is pretty single-minded. It's like your partner signing you up to jump out of an 
airplane because they think it would be fun.
NOT!!!
 Sit down and feel this out folks.
would you want your partner to sign you up for 
boot camp fitness just because they think it is good for you?
AND
That they require you to go on the days of the weeks and times of the day
they deem appropriate?
Just imagine the things your partner may be thinking about your sudden interest in
something that doesn't seem to even be real or have any importance.
Just imagine what it would be like for a very grounded and scientifically minded individual to 
watch their lover holding their hands quietly over
someones body... possibly with their eyes closed.
It might be laughable! 
Heck I might even laugh at that.
 The next time that you get the bright idea to 
"do" Reiki in your home
or on your spouse to change the energy...
be aware they probably feel like everything is just fine.
They probably feel they are happy the way they are.
No one likes forced change.
AND 
My dears if you are focussing on your Partner because you think Reiki will
change your relationship...
OH YEAH Reiki will change your relationship;
you may encounter more distance, grumbling, and flat out disgust
about the things you are doing, the things you are
thinking about your partner and the space you share,
that creates war not peace.
You can not force Reiki or any belief on anyone for their own good or not!
Reiki is not the set for the boxing ring where you go to face off against your partner.
It's not about fight,
control,
blame,
or rigidity.
If your partner does not want to participate so what,
not everyone likes yard work, knitting, running, swimming,
dogs, cats, birds, or snakes.  
Not everyone cares about
becoming more healthy, thinking differently, or healing the world.
Seriously folks, thank goodness for that!
I can be good at what I do.
I'm a great Reiki facilitator for those that think it is important.
I am a pretty dang good cook and I am awesome at 
running a house hold, getting people fed, and teaching boundaries.
I'm great at loving people, decent at writing.
I have a great time teaching and doing Reiki.
I love learning and am passionate about my spirituality.
I adore my partner and doing things she likes gives me a great deal of happiness.
I also happen to be decent at reading energy, helping people find patterns that make them unhappy and unhealthy, and sometimes I can talk to the dead.
Does that mean my partner gets it?
Does it mean she is on board?
Does it mean we hold freaky deaky seances nightly?
No you guys, it doesn't.
We do laundry and housework, we watch movies and make dinner,
we clean, we walk dogs, we love eachother.
We even don't always understand eachother. 
Reality is that is about as normal as it gets and she knows if she
ever wants to really know about anything I do she can ask.
And if not that is ok too.
Give yourselves and your relationships a break.
Go ahead and love Reiki if you want to and let your family and partner love what they love.
Choose freedom and love every time!

Friday, November 1, 2013

Lola

It's taken me far too long to finally sit down and try to figure out how to write this.

 
 
I recently went to West Virginia to help take care of my
partner's grandmother who was 96, almost 97 years young!
 
 
 
None of us expected things to happen the way they did.
 
She declined rapidly and my partner and her family
lost a really sharp minded, stunning woman.
I was lucky enough to witness the
incredible love and connection of this
stupendously large family.
 
 
Lola was the youngest of 15 children 16 if you count a twin that passed at birth.
I was privileged to hear Lola look at an old photo and tell us
the history of each sibling.  I got to feel for the
first time in my life what it must be to have family roots.
The land we were on was tilled by the blood, sweat, and tears of the Christopher family.
Truly their heritage laid in the very soil I walked on.
I didn't have that kind of family history so it was pretty
incredible to hear the stories and be shown the places where the family
had worked, lived, and loved.
 
 
 
My partners aunt and her husband just lived down the road to give Lola
the opportunity to have assistance but to retain her
independence.  I realized as we shared her home in those last days how
important her independence was to her and how very much
her family loved her to try and keep that option
open to her.
 
 
By the end of this visit that was filled with the deep sadness of losing
their loved one there was also a rekindling of the fire of family in the hearts
and minds of those Lola was connected to and served in her life.
She loved animals and there were reminders of that everywhere I turned.
It's no wonder that my partner has the huge heart that she does,
her Grandmother meant everything to her.  I got pretty
good at being able to pick out Lola's siblings from old photos of family
reunions and remembering who was married to whom.
 
 
 
I did what I could to help the family out,
it's not always easy to know what to do in a situation like that.
What I do know is that the lessons
in love, patience, and connection I learned while
I was there may be some of the most important lessons I have
ever been so honored to learn.
Her funeral was held in a church that her own mother made sure
was built, and to Lola's credit the gentleman
conducting the service never had dry eyes.  I find myself wishing I had
a little more time with Lola to hear about the history of her family
and to see life through her eyes.
 
 
 
My love for the elders of our world started with my own grandmother
and it continued when I became a nurse.  I have literally spent
hundreds of hours listening to late night stories, having cookie
tea parties, and shed tears with the elders of the communities
I have lived in as I worked in elder care for 10 years.  I have watched at their
lives have been turned upside down by disease and lack of money, I have watched as they have
been sequestered to 12x10 foot spaces and made to share a room
with a complete stranger.
I have watched as their choices have dwindled in
front of their eyes, to the point that they may not even be allowed
to choose their own clothing or take their time with their own
care because staff is rushed to meet quotas.
I have watched as once powerful people have been shrunken down to what
other people choose for them.
I can't tell you how relieved I am that this was not Lola's experience,
nor was it my grandmothers. Hospice made sure of that.
This is the reason I have decided to go back to school and
further my nursing education.
I want to work on hospice cases and be certain people always retain their dignity and choices.
I will be forever grateful to my partner for trusting me enough to allow me to care for her loved one, and forever grateful that Lola reminded me where the heart of my career
lies.


Friday, September 13, 2013

I love the quote that says
"Live like someone left the gate open!"


I've had some interesting inquiries regarding how to use Reiki in personal relationships recently.
The thing I find the most interesting is that my answer doesn't 
immediately come from the Reiki precepts or the symbols, or even specific Reiki training.
My answer comes from the golden rule
My answer comes from years of personal work
My answer comes from forgiveness
My answer comes from understanding that behaviors good and not so good come from
previous personal experiences, 
we can not honestly know what has shaped people,
what they have been through, nor can we always expect them to understand
that they are being unkind; 
because...
the people we share our lives with are doing the best they can just like we are,
and if someone holds an attitude that says other people are not doing the best they can...
well; I challenge
those people to stop worrying about the actions of others and get real about
your own shortcomings, 
we all have them.


Using Reiki to assist personal relationship healing is a fabulous way
to help create harmony, peace, and increase loving partnerships.
Reiki can not be measured or quantified or defined, 
therefore its workings are limitless and boundless.
 
 
And I can not say enough about doing your own WORK!


Freedom comes not from stepping on people or needing to puff up our egos to feel
good about ourselves.   
Real freedom comes from looking
at all the ways that the EGO attempts to take front stage in relationships,
and understanding
that EGO causes the insanity that demands attention and having everything our own way.
 
 
We can't change anyone else...


Reiki is not the magic pill that we use on our family, friends, or partner to "fix"
them or us.  Reiki is a tool that helps us to find
balance within the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual aspects of ourselves.
What a gift!


If you have come to me asking how to stop griping at your loved ones, 
judging people, how to feel worthy of love,
how to not be in repeated relationships that belittle you...

YES!


Reiki can help you 
 
 
 
AND
 
 
 
there is not an easy pill or prescription or one time fix to these issues.
 
 
 
It takes discipline and daily attention to watch what it is in you that invites some
of these behaviors.  It takes always looking at ourselves first and then taking ACTION
to make changes and forgive all the reasons we act in ways we aren't
proud of.
And loving others means we don't arbitrarily assume they are terrible people
because they are exhibiting bad behavior.  We take a moment out of the emotional
junk long enough to remember we love this person, then we apply LOGIC
to the situation.


That doesn't mean lie down and take it, but it does mean
diffusing emotion, doing our work regarding how we feel about the issue, and then deciding
if it really is about the other person or not.
Projection is a huge weapon that can inflict unresolvable wounds.


My loves,
do your daily Reiki precepts,
be aware of your own thoughts and energy,
be responsible for your words and deeds,
understand words and attitudes do wound others,
find a balance between personal work and personal play,
be sure that if you are going to deal with an issue that it is truly worth it,
use your symbols,
especially your distance symbol
to work on memories and thoughts that cause you pain and stress;
and remember if your own mind is out of control with repeating thoughts, worry, repetative stress
that isn't your child's, lover's, friend's, or family's fault,
it is your own, because you are not doing what it takes to calm those
thoughts and behaviors; 
so don't take it out on other people and if you do slip up and wound someone
be very generous with apologies and
even more generous with getting your own stuff together.
There is no free ride in 
living a conscious, loving, incredible life.


If you want to 
"Live like someone left the gate open"
Get real, stop the behaviors, make ammends,
get to work on your personal stuff,
and ALWAYS choose love my dears,
ALWAYS 
choose love!

Thursday, August 22, 2013


I don't know if I will ever get used to  the synchronicities that
come with living a conscious healing filled life.


I Learned Reiki In the year 2000, that has been 13 years ago.
I spent the past 4 to 5 years less involved with Reiki...
I really never thought that would happen.


What I didn't understand as I waded through the trials and tribulations of the last few years
was that I had been working so deeply with Reiki for so many years
to be a beacon of light to others, focussed outside of myself and on the healing of others
that in a large way I forgot me.


Even though I utilized Reiki in my daily life my teaching schedule slowed down considerably,
my focus was on survival and I didn't seem to be able to 
grasp much more than that.  All the while I asked myself in the dark recesses of my mind
when not even I was listening, what indeed was going on?


At this point in my evolution I have come to the understanding that if I am to offer myself
in service to the world I have to balance my own care even more carefully than I 
have in the past.
That there can indeed be no excuse and far less laziness involved in my life
toward my own care.


That means saying no
It means weighing what I spend my energy and time on,
and making sure it serves me and my family.
It means boundaries with friends and family,
It means getting straight with money, time, health, food, basically everything.
It means supporting myself in my own good and supporting
others in knowing that they are
handling their lives just fine!


We have to remind ourselves that our own lives are our business,
when I work with another person their healing is indeed their business, not mine.
Facillitating healing means that I offer what I can...
then I release.
Release my own thoughts, feelings, opinions regarding my clients.
That I do my own work and deal with my own short comings.


Not long after I was reminded of this I began doing Reiki sessions again,
I began coaching again, and recently
have done more massage than I have in a long time.
I feel my life becoming more balanced and I 
feel myself coming out of the survival attitude and actions into 
a more powerful self empowered awareness.


I suppose I needed to spend some time int he swamps so that when it
was time to emerge I would recognize at even
more deep and intimate levels the love and good available
to me.


Nothing but good comes of this,
and the lessons of application of Reiki and
consciousness toward our own lives
most likely will remain never ending for me.



I feel that I have somehow graduated to a more mature understanding of Reiki
maybe a more mature understanding of life...
Definitely a more mature love of my life.
I am thankful beyond belief for those that I find in my life, thankful for those that have moved on, and deeply thankful how My Creotor and Reiki show up in the faces and places in my life
to remind me of my own divinity and the need to 
be aware and awake in my life.
It's the only way I can truly be ready to serve another person!!!

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Listen With Your Heart!

 Isn't it interesting how the moments of our lives fit together to make a unique tapestry that can either
tell the story of all the glorious and beautiful moments of a life
or
It can illustrate pain and delusion and loss
depending on where we focus our heart?

It has taken me years and years and hundreds of hours of introspection and 
therapy to loosen that hold on my mind
and I still catch myself defining myself by my pain at times.
Our society does that.
We aren't taught to come together in joy, health, and balance
by our mentors for the most part.
Many of us have been taught by family that has been molded by their
own tragedy's to be there for each other when something goes awry.
What about the rest of the time, 
even our schools teach about atrocity, suffering, genocide...
I understand the need to educate about these things,,
yet many of us were never even given a glimpse of an antenna to feel,
notice, or seek joy.

 This picture is one of my favorites, my sweetheart doesn't really understand why.
I think she looks introspective, a bit serious, as her
wonderful doggy looks on from the corner.
She's surrounded by her favorite place and
I love the way she seeks happiness in her life, even as the sun rises to meet her.
She truly is one of the most powerful people I have ever met.


I've had many people in my life, people that have inspired me, 
people I have learned from and learned because of...
and the woman in this picture may just
be my biggest hero.


Not because she is someone who studies sacred texts,
eats organic and sustainable, meditates 10 hours a day, or can turn
herself into a tasty pretzel doing yoga...
nope she doesn't do any of that (right now).


She may be my biggest hero because she looks for
the good, joy, and fun in each day.  Because she absolutely recognizes
her own limitations and is honest about them, and
because she chooses not to let them define her.
Because no matter what she has been through she has an ineffable
understanding of herself that says 
"I can do anything and everything I want to do and no one can stop me!"
She is my hero because she saves little tiny fluffball doggies
from the mean streets of Orlando, because
she brings home organic eggs for me,
because she is so certain of her love for me she is a formidable force
of steadfastness that I can anchor to.
Because she loves God and believes in Karma 
and makes no apologies for herself unless really necessary and
ALWAYS 
takes responsibility for her actions good and not so good.
 

Because she laughs at my serious side,
because she laughs at my worries,
because she sees who I am when I don't.


Mostly though She may be my hero
because I have become so much better at listening with my own heart.
So much better at forgiving myself and others,
so much more able to choose love over fear.
She is fearless is so much of who she is and how she meets the world,
I can only hope to learn some of that from her.


So to me no Guru, lama, spiritual teacher, or reverend has
a higher place in my mind or heart.
No spiritual teaching, no new process,
nothing to me is more Spiritual than watching my sweetheart
meet life and it's challenges raw and real everyday.
There is such beauty in someone
like her that sometimes 
I feel like my heart is growing bigger and bigger and
it may not be contained within me
any longer.


Below is how  I see her everyday.
It's how she meets the world and I am so incredibly
thankful to be a part of that.
Joy is a daily part of my life and I love that I can share that
with her and that she is so great at 
teaching me more!!


Wednesday, May 22, 2013

What if you were about to get everything you ever wanted?


What if you were about to get everything you ever wanted?
How would you live your life every day?


I'm about to get everything I have ever wanted.
Nope it isn't a million dollars... it's worth more than that.
It's not a mansion, it has way more space than that, and the view of my life is 
quite a bit more spectacular than any silly mansion view.
It's not a new convertable sports car...
I know they are fun to drive
but driving my Soul is far more fun for me.
It isn't piles of jewels,
eating at expensive resturants,
nor is it traveling to places all over the globe...
although that may actually be in 
the cards.


I am about to get everything I have ever wanted because
I already have it!
I know it sounds insane but I realized it just this morning.


My children have grown into incredible people and they are
maneuvering through their lives learning to be better people... 
that indeed is all I have ever wanted for them.
I already have a supportive spiritual community,
a community that has continued to embrace me even though I moved over an hour away.
I am stepping back into my spiritual studies which gladdens my heart
in a way nothing else can...
through those studies I become so much closer to our creator within my heart.
I have indeed found that people I thought were my friends
have slipped away, creating a clean slate for 
me to renew and deepen my resolve to surround myself with people of high moral fiber
and quality.


I will be working again with a group of people that I just love.
I am honored to be welcomed back into that family of people, and feel
truly blessed to share that space with them again.
I had to leave the St Cloud area to heal and learn,
and to realize that my life and the people I care most about are easily accessible to me more near Orlando.
It is time to be with the people that love, adore, and support me.
My grandson is born, what more can be said there except I will be 
much closer to him and his mom and dad and I will see him more often.


Last but certainly not least.


I have yearned for a love that time would lie down and lay still for...
my entire life this is the one thing I have wanted.
When I was younger I believed that somehow all sadness would be fixed by finding that
one person I was MEANT to be with.
My life path number is 6... for those of you that don't know exactly what that means
it is a numerology way of finding out the theme of your life.
Mine fits me to a T!


Life path number 6 is the path of the caretaker.
It's the path of the stay at  home mom and the cook and the lover of
other people's happiness.
It is also the path of lessons and decision making and learning that there are indeed limits
to what one person could or should do.
It is the path of the people pleaser... an out of balance people pleaser will end up sickly...
and here I am
dealing with fibromyalgia flare ups.



The good news:
I have been given a love that time will indeed lie down and stand still for...
not in the literal terms of standing truly still,
but more in the terms that the internal landscape of my
heart finally feels free to see the views of love that fill every cell of my body,
erupts into my mind dragging down the unkind words and concepts that took root
and grew into cancers that broke down my own self worth
for so many years.
I have spent many years hacking my way free of the briars of judgements
passed on by well meaning people who said they loved me.
The mansion of my heart has expanded with vaulted ceilings,
gorgeous hard wood floors and staircases that shine.
Sunlight that glistens and sparkles on every surface.



The freedom to express one's self and to be loving must be one of the greatest
gifts ever.
The love that has entered my life is not perfect, 
no thing really ever is.
It's honestly the spirit of trying and trying again that made me realize that
I do indeed have everything I have ever wanted.
I have been told I dont have to work... but I choose to.
I have been told to do what makes me happy... I do choose this 
and...
I also choose her happiness as well.
I have been told I am the one.
I believe that to be true, not because of predetermination
(although that may have something to do with it)
but because I choose to be the one each day.
The real fairytale
it's not in thinking someone is going to fix whats wrong or fill up some kind of hole within us.


The real fairytale is recognizing that someone of quality has chosen you
to make mistakes with, to share grief with, to
be broken with, to be vulnerable with.
The beauty and happiness and everything going well stuff is the bonus of
the relationships in our lives.
AND
when someone trusts you enough to tell you their fears,
to admit things to you that they have never ever felt before,
to spend special secret moments so dialed in
to you and your happiness and what you need,
to be willing to give to you more than they give to themselves even if only sometimes,
when someone does not agree with your decision but holds
you as you make it and vows love and support anyway,
to support your spiritual choices and views and not understand them even if it may scare them,
for someone to admit they dont understand but are earnest about being willing to try ...


My God!
 that is the love time will lie down and stay still for.
Because my heart will always beat brighter,
stronger, fueled with more fire, love, and passion for my life
and the life I am now sharing with my partner.
Willingness is the key,
if we are at least willing then anything can be solved.
All this time,
I didn't recognize...
I already have everything I have ever wanted.


Monday, May 20, 2013

Girl scout rule

This is Amos he lives at pather ridge here in florida and I can't wait to meet him.
This pic really has nothing to do with my post tonight,
I just think he is a sexy guy!


Tonight I'm going to be short and sweet.


There is a rule in the Girl Scouts that I have always found to be important.
It goes along with the golden rule for me, 
you know;
Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.
The girl scouts say to leave a space 
cleaner and better than when you found it.
this includes actual buildings and nature.


I love that concept.
To care whether someone else does or not.
When I was younger I really didn't understand that concept.
Now though,
through my path of spirituality and my
practice of Reiki and the 5 principles
I really understand the deep understanding of leaving a thing to the best of your
ability better than when you found it.
 
 
This means relationships too.
Too many people use their painful past as a reason to treat others 
in an unkind fashion.
I have come a very long way from the immature girl that used a 
sharp tongue and fists to communicate my displeasure with perceived enemies.


One of the greatest gifts of a daily Reiki practice is to
reach deep inside and make a choice to leave
someone's heart better than you found it.
To me this means my family, friends, and fellow humans.
Each time I feel the need to get angry or begin to feel frustrated
I do my best to find the place within me that can honor the other person.
Because by honoring the other person I am really
honoring myself.


It doesn't mean that I choose to be hurt or abused.
It just means that I am committed to turning the other cheek
and asking for healing for myself and the person in question.


I truly believe that God is watching in one form or another.
At the end of my life I want to be able to 
sit with God and anyone else near by and feel proud of the decisions I made
when it comes to the treatment of life.
Nature, animals, humans... 
everything really.


Did I choose to honor life as often as possible?
Did I choose to find compassion when I could?
Did I remember to see myself in that person and choose a different way to perceive my world?
Did I choose to honor the creator of everything even when someone
else might be acting in an unkind way toward me???


If I never learned anything else in my life perhaps for me this is the most
incredible spiritual lesson of all.
Feeling challenged to do the right thing even in the face of those who do not.
Which way do I choose?
How do I honor peace within my heart and support peace within the world???
How have I honored my own learning by my actions?


Just for today ...
I will not anger
I will not worry
I will do my job honestly
I will be thankful for my many blessings
I will be kind to all living things....

Usui Sensei did not add
when I feel like it, only when I am not tired, only when other people are nice to me...
it isn't a sometimes thing
it's an everyday all the time thing...
and it is a reminder that I am certainly not perfect!!
 
 
Namaste!!!



Monday, May 6, 2013

Letting go

 One thing I have always used this blog for is to use my own personal
experiences to illustrate how to use Reiki and other techniques during challenging times.
That sweet puppy is Elijah.

Eli was a fantastic wonderful boy who I enjoyed very very much.
Eli was also ill and recently he went to doggy heaven,
I still catch myself trying to get home to let him out,
then I realize he is with God.
And
I know he is also with me.
 A very important pattern in my life is my ability to again and again make some really
tough decisions, to let go of people that are unable to  be
a positive influence in my life.


Setting boundaries for loved ones is not simple, it is not always cut and dry, and it is
truly the most incredible lesson in intimate self care that I have really ever experienced.
We all have loved and lost.


We have lived and even felt as though with the loss of loved ones that we have died a little.
Loss is one of the most meaningful character building experiences that a person can have.
We can be dragged down under the weight of it and drown in the pain,
or we can somehow make a choice to find a speck of light and focus on it.


Recently I began to feel shame regarding the many experiences I have had in my life that have 
ended in loss, loss of innocence, loss of identity, loss of strength, and due to some of those experiences
such confusion that I was really unable to understand or feel that I had the ability to choose.
I was a good girl and did what I was told, believed what I was told, and never questioned if I should listen.
I have not felt shame about my past in years.  
I have come to understandings that have led me to understand why some people do suffer life experiences
such as I have had,
and how successfully moving through them creates love, patience, and understanding for those
who have had similar experiences.
 I am completely humbled by the gift the Elijah has given me to once again
face reality and to choose the best and highest good for him and for me.
To feel certain it was the right thing to do.
Some people can not accept that somethings must be done,
some people would make different decisions,
that is OK too.
This short life Eli shared with me taught me so much about love and acceptance.
His departure from this dimension caused me to search for even deeper faith,
challenged my faith,
and allowed me to feel deep and hidden shame for the parts of my past that are yet unhealed.


How does this have anything to do with Reiki?
Again... for me everything has to do with Reiki.


With judgement, especially judgement from loved ones can come pain.
The confusing thing is that we make an error and think that the loved one is trying to hurt us.
Often we stay confused and hurt about it and never look deeper.
I have been practicing and learning from Reiki for 13 years now.
I have learned through daily application,
through persistence,
through self challenge that rarely is the surface thought the real issue.
Through allowing Eli to rest and through 
releasing people from my life and inviting others in
the past 3 months have really cut deeply into the other layers of
my psyche that were not ready to heal.


What I now know is that living the way someone else thinks I should is an error.
I have learned that the pattern of being a good girl still exists within me and deserves some healing attention.
I have learned that other people don't have to understand me, it's not a requirement.
I am re-learning that judgement is a form of abuse and I do not have to tolerate it in my life.
I have awakened to my own power... not as a mother, or a friend, or a lover
but simply as a human.
I have re-committed myself to Reiki, teaching, and learning.
I have re-committed to myself before anyone or anything else.
This is a fundamental and precious honor I do myself.
Reiki functions as the back bone and as the laser scalpel that slices deeply
into the very things that must be healed to be whole and to 
serve myself and my community.

It is with this deepest work that I truly honor
myself,
my partner,
my children,
my grandchildren,
my mother,
my ancestors,
my family,
my friends,
and
my loved ones in Spirit.
Being broken is the easy part,
finding courage to stand up to all the ghosts that made you feel broken
that's the true meaning of
Wholeness, strength, and fortitude.


Namaste!

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

I love finding random works of art that illustrate the energy that exists between people.

This specific picture could be two people talking
however, I'd prefer to believe they are having
a loving, long, lingering kiss.

One of the things that I love that I learned in my Tantric studies
is the act of eye gazing.
 
It doesn't sound like much.  Looking into someone's eyes, but if you have ever felt
love for another human and gazed with the softness of that
love into the eyes of your beloved
there is nothing that is more
intimate, complete, or honest.
 
Everyone has heard the saying the eyes are the gateway to the soul.
 
In Reiki we teach that you can "beam", essentially send Reiki using the eyes and a soft gaze
to open ourselves up to the flow of the energy.
The softness of the gaze is the trick.
 
Have you ever had someone just using their eyes come into your space
and make you feel uncomfortable?
So uncomfortable that you look away or perhaps change your body language,
or even leave the area?
The eyes and the intent behind them are quite powerful, and the person that
uses a direct stare to intimidate or cause harm may not understand all they are really communicating.
 
What a gift then to have at our disposal.
What a powerful talisman we have to communicate the deepest and most secret parts
of our love with our beloved, our life partner, our children.
 
I was recently gifted with an experience of sharing Reiki with my own beloved.
I have shared Reiki in the past with friends, family, clients, and lovers,
yet...
I have never been so humbled nor so blessed during a session.
 
I have the incredible opportunity to love a person that is in my eyes fearless.
A person that moves forward confidently and passionately.
A person that is probably the strongest and safest person I have ever met.
A person that I can't imagine ever living without.
 
I was given an incredible gift when I was given permission to give my own beloved Reiki.
The grace and ease with which the energy began to flow was heightened because of
my own loving and cherishing feelings toward my partner.  
There was an immediate opening within my own heart. 
There was an experience of  one-ness that I have only ever had
while sitting with trees in nature or gazing at the majesty of the ocean.
Selflessness, peace, comfort...
and more that can not be described by mere words and phrases.

It is moments like this with my Beloved that cause me to feel blessed and humbled,
that someone so honorable, honest, true, and incredible
sees past my quirks and my selfconsciousness...
sees past my own limiting thoughts about myself and gazes at me with the 
incredible silky softness of love from her incredibly deep and soulful eyes.
 
It is my one desire to everyday find a way to create
a special and meaningful moment of honestly and lovingly gazing
at the one person that makes me want to be a better more loving person.
It is my deepest desire to use everything I know
to create deeper and more loving moments every single day
in celebration of life and love between us.
 
Reiki unknowingly gave me more passion and more fire to study even more deeply
the connection between the lovers and how to use Reiki to heal
and deepen the bond between people that yearn for a once in a lifetime love.
Thank goodness,
I have been waiting my entire life!!
 
Reiki blessings!!!!


Saturday, March 16, 2013


I don't know if you guys remember or not but I love Calligraphy.
Recently the schools in this area basically abolished teaching the children handwriting skills,
I personally find that abhorrent!

I used to love learning to write.  I have a memory of being in Kindergarten sitting in a classroom with noisy kids and I sat staring at the wall behind the teacher, where the large and small letters of the alphabet
stood advertized.  Somehow I knew even at that age, that the keys to many secrets
were lying within my ability not only to learn those letters perfectly,
but in understanding how to combine them, carefully, eloquently, and masterfully.

So my love of calligraphy at times takes me to the words of poets long gone.
What better way to practice a craft than to beautify
already meaningful and voluptuous phrases and romantic ideals;
than with the careful curves and striking strength of each letter penned
carefully across the page.

The only thing more meaningful than that is the heart that burns within a chest
that yearns to make a difference, or touch a soul
by the very work of your own hands?
As if the words take on a living breathng life of their own because of the care and
tenderness with which each letter is written...

I have had moments in my life where what I feel for a person
seems cheapened, and sadly with lack of true majesty, the 
words uttered didn't even come close to expressing the deepest most intimate
meanings of my heart and soul.
It's a travesty!

There was a time when distance indeed made the heart grow fonder, where written letters were sent to the beloveds of our heart.
A time when we made ready to receive that special someone after weeks
and sometimes months of waiting, 
before the internet what we had was paper and pen.
we had quiet time that was used to muse and to remember
the lingering looks and the sweet words uttered.

Just imagine for a moment these words uttered to you:

There is a place where words are born of silence,
a place where whispers of the heart arise.
There is a place where voices sing your beauty,
a place where every breath carves your image in my soul.


This is part of a poem by Rumi
I just love Rumi.
Imagine it though if when you came home from work or a long walk on the beach
you move toward your mail box excited
because it seems as though your lover
should be sending you a message soon.
Imagine a parchment envelope with your name and address
lovingly written in magnificent and antiquated script...
Already you would know this is special.

You would delicately open this envelope because you would take care with
something that your sweetheart had worked that hard on.
And now imagine you pulling out a piece of
really beautiful parchment, perhaps written on pink to express 
love and softness to you... it would be obvious that every aspect of
this letter would be planned specifically and very special.

Now imagine these words written on the paper:
 
-OR-

Every question I ask is about you,
every step I take is toward you.
I slept well last night,
but I woke up drunk.
I must have dreamt about you.

and imagine that your lover took the time not only to write in 
old world script, 
but that time was taken to embellish a few of the letters with
color and gilt gold.

How would that be for you?
How much deeper do you think you would find your connection to your sweetheart?
Wouldn't it be better than turning on your computer
checking e-mail
with nothing really said?

Here is my point, 
the next time you want to do something for the people you love, invite them to dinner and give them hand written menus or create place cards.
The next time you want to make a difference to your lover,
take the time to find some beautiful words,
beautiful paper,
and let your beautiful heart guide you as you create
a work of art that is powered by your incredible heart.
Your life is art my darlings,
never forget!