Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Broken hearts

 This is a painting by Julia Watkins she is one of my favorite artists right now!

So... I've been hearing an awful lot about broken hearts lately.
I don't think I ever understood how many rules go with 
ending a relationship or for that matter beginning a new relationship.
Apparently among many rules there are appropriate times for beginning the act of dating, I mean how long is sufficient for this?  How to choose? Where to go? What to wear? 
Oh yeah and tell other people where you are going just in case you meet tonight's axe murderer.
Apparently be sure not to take said new dating possibility to your ex's favorite places, even if these places were your favorites first.  Also do not wear anything on a new date that has been purchased by ex, that is simply tacky (wink).  Also don't act too interested in new possibility infront of your ex if you have remained friends... it may unleash a beast that you have to reckon with.

Rules.... I can't keep up with them.

What I love though about ending a relationship is that it gives me an opportunity to seriously look at my actions as best I can, to review how I am in a relationship, and whether or not I have honored myself and my newly ex by my behavior.  Just because something does not work out does not,
in my opinion,
give me the right to stomp around on the head of someone that I have loved and may still love me.
That is what people can see as the many trainwrecks of screaming banshee breakups... 
you know what I am talking about... I know you do.

 I love this butterfly picture, took it right in my front yard... was a great gift that day!

So here is what I love about beginning to date and new relationships.

Here you are... 
hopefully armed with everything you know about yourself in relationships.
And if you have given any thought to it at all you have been choosey with the said date possibility.
You have weighed any prior discussions on the telephones,
you have read profiles if you are an online dater, 
you have really given thought to what it is that you would like to manifest in a possible partner.
And if you are anything like me... 
I get practical when I am scared!
Meeting new people for the sake of meeting them makes me feel like vomiting!
You can stick me infront of a room of 250 people to discuss and teach Reiki and I will be as happy as a lark...
Go ahead and send me out the door on a date and everything I
have eaten makes a mad dash to come out the way it went in.
Now if I make it past the initial freak out I have to deal with my shyness...

Ahem, anyway...
then there is like this magical space if things seem to work out.
Food is actually being swallowed and talking is happening.
And without meaning to, possibilities may begin to drift across the surface of your mind.

So there it is this litle magical area where everything is new and full of potential and you 
get to float around in it.
I have to face it I am in love with love,
and I am in love with the deep resonant changes love can make inside the heart and soul of
two people... or more if that is what you are into.

Possibility of love is about the only thing that can get me more excited than loving love.
And then after maybe one or two dates you may find that 
things aren't what we had hoped and it ends.
This is where people really get messed up inside their heads.

Think about it this way,
if the universe finds someone unsuitable they will find a way out of your life.
If someone realizes their heart is unavailable; for goodness sakes
find it within you to forgive them because most likely you have been there too.
Be generous with your heart even in circumstances that may feel painful...
even in circumstances that begin that inner questioning about 
What is wrong with me?
What did I do?
I don't need to go further with these things we all have heard that sneaky inner voice that tries to steal away our well being.

Safety is an illusion if you are looking for a person outside of you to cause you to feel safe.
NO ONE can make us safe.
Safety lives within our very hearts where true love comes from.
It is silent, it is steady, and it comes from within.
And if you feel some twinges of pain after a person you have dated calls it quits be very glad
that you have had the experience at all because my loves, it is teaching you how
to find what you do want, how you do want to be treated, 
and it gets you one step closer to the person the universe is working
to unite you with.

If you find yourself with someone that is afraid to make choices to be with you, gracefully
let them move on... it doesn't mean they don't care it just means that they aren't ready.

It is being fiercely courageous in the face of possibility that allows the heart to be cracked open
enough for God to place his hand inside us and begin the beating of our divine and loving

Sitting on the side lines because you might get hurt isn't the reason we have come here my loves.

Remember that life is to be lived and we have only the time we have here,
no guarantees, just us doing what we can...
Be brazen and be bold and be full of your own joy,
IF someone else can not see how beautiful you are and does not see their future in your eyes
they weren't meant for you...
and aren't you glad you know that sooner rather than later???